First…

First!

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “First!.”

First something…

Man, I can’t remember hardly anything, how will I remember my First time doing something… haha…

Okay… let’s see, the first time I became an Auntie… it’s only happened once, and it was actually the first time I was also in the delivery room for the birth of a baby. So it was a big day!

My sister, Kimmy, she’s a year younger than me, always does everything before me, it’s just always been that way, she’s tried everything before me, I was always cautious and she is very carefree and just goes with the flow, both of our dominant characteristics are good and bad! haha. that’s another story for another time, but anyway, she is the only one of us girls to have a baby so far! So my sister was supposed to have her baby in early February, I think the 7th, but it was like the 22nd when my sister finally had her baby and to be honest, I can’t remember if she was induced or not, so yeah, I’m at work and I get the phone call that my sister is going into labour! Very exciting and it’s about 45 mins to drive back into the city from my work so I left work early and got to the hospital and go inside and into my sister’s room, my Mom is already in there and my sister is like in so much pain, she looks like she wants to run out of her skin. I just remember feeling so scared for her, she was just rolling around on the bed in agony, it was really tough to see, my Mom was in bossy mode, getting me to grab this and that and so I was listening. But I don’t remember it taking super long for her to start pushing, I just know that it was time for her to push and so she started to push and I had to hold her leg. I always had heard some funny stories or crazy stories about seeing what it looked like when the baby was coming through the birthing canal, so I took a quick look, and let’s just say, it really is something for medical eyes only lol that’s what I think anyway, so I kept my view on my sister’s face and the Doctor’s. I had to switch sides with my Mom, so I was like on my sisters left hand side now, that’s when the baby finally came out. Our family didn’t know the gender of the baby until this moment, so out comes this long baby, upside down, and the doctor flips the baby over and says, “it’s a girl!” and I seen her first in my family, my Mom was busy attending to my sister who was like seriously near death, her heart was beating super fast, like over 200 or something and her blood pressure was through the roof and they were pulling out those heart jump starter thingies and her eyes were rolling up into her head and it was the freakiest thing ever, but I just remember peeking at my sister, seeing my Mom by her and just seeing the chaos, but then refocusing on my new little niece. I accompanied her with the nurse to the side of the room, where they start to weigh the baby and measure and poke at them. I got to cut the umbilical cord, those things are hard to cut, it was like a very weird texture as I was cutting into it, kind of like rubber and you could feel in the action of cutting this cord that you were making a huge change for this baby. It was super cool. My niece was born at 6:12 p.m., she weighed 8.1 lbs, and she was 23.5 inches long! she was this skinny, froggy body looking baby. Her head was all cone shaped because of coming through the birth canal, but she was completely perfect. My life made sense in that moment. She’s sleeping beside me right now, and she’s still as beautiful as she was back then. Tonight, as she was going to sleep, she tells me, “you know you really should get to sleep too! You’re going to be cranky in the morning and have a hard day!” and I said, “oh come on, I don’t have to go to sleep just cause you do!” (we always joke to each other, give each other a rough time kinda thing, all in good fun), she goes, “Okay, well that’s your responsibility.” lol a 6 year old.
So there she was, just this odd looking little person, she didn’t cry, she didn’t freak out, she was just looking all over the place and she seemed very curious. And then they gave her the needle, and she cried of course, they brought her over to her Mom, but my poor sister was bleeding very heavily and was being attended to by quite a few nurses and a couple doctors, and so she didn’t really get to hold her first or anything, so it was me and I felt so blessed to be able to be there for my baby. So then I go out and get my sisters, my Dad and my Grandma Rosaline. They are all so happy to meet our baby, we had lots of other relatives in the waiting room, but only immediate family and of course our dear, sweet Grandma could come back and see our baby. Grandma Rosaline held on to Selah and told her, “You don’t cry baby girl, you are here in this beautiful world and you have a beautiful family and you will have a beautiful life.” She looked so awesome holding her great granddaughter. I have that memory in my mind forever too. Our Grandma died shortly after her 77th birthday, about a month before Selah turned one. So it was a great blessing to have her there with us when our dear sweet Selah girl was born.
I spent the night at the hospital holding on to our baby love. She was still all curled up into a little ball, and her head had gone to it’s normal shape, she was so tiny and had lots of hair and was just perfect. Her birth day was the best day of my life, things have only gotten better each year that she shares her life with us. We are so blessed to have this little gal.

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This is Selah Peach on the day she was brought home. Look at her cute little face, we had no idea if she would be a boy or a girl, so our baby wore green and yellow and white all her early days, but from a young age she has always said her favourite colour is “rainbow” lol so she loves all colours…

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This is Selah, 6 years old! she’s the sweetest gal, we love this baby! 🙂

Who I am and Why I’m here

So I’m taking this blogging course to learn how to blog properly. I feel like this is a good opportunity for me to start writing a meaningful blog.

one of the questions was, why write a public blog over a private journal? I think it is interesting to write down your thoughts and to have others contribute to them in good healthy discussion. Also if my family were to read my blog it would be good, I don’t post too much on Facebook, but it would be nice to have ways to interact with them.

So who I am, well, I did write a bit about who I am on the about page, but nothing in great detail. I don’t really know what to write about to discuss who I am. I guess the first thought that came to mind is that I am a Blackfoot woman. I am from Kainai. Also known as the Blood Tribe. I grew up on the reserve and have almost always lived in Blackfoot territory, I lived for a few months in SK, but I was never a permanent resident, just there for a few months and then came back home, so I have almost always lived in the traditional territory of my People. Even when I lived in Calgary I was still living in Blackfoot country. I love it here, I think we live in one of the most beautiful areas on the planet. I love to go for drives on Going To The Sun Road, located in Glacier National Park on the U.S. side of the border. As for other information about who I am, I am 33 years old, I am very close to my family. I have 3 younger sisters and one niece. My Mom and I have a great friendship and my Dad is also very dear to me, so we are a close family and I live for them. I also have a lot of family members from my Dad’s side and my Mom’s side, I have many cousins and I am thankful to be close to each of them. I also have my Grandma (Mom’s mom) and lots of Aunties and Uncles and extended family. Family is everything!

I am currently a university student at the U of L, I enjoy my program, Addictions Counselling. My long term goal is to become a Family Therapist. I don’t know exactly how I’ll get there, but I know that the program I am in now is going to help me get closer to that goal. it’s a great program and I love it so far. I enjoy the content and some of the Profs at the U are amazing! So much knowledge and opportunities to learn, it is quite exciting.

I get to do a practicum sometime in there so I will be working in a counselling setting and will be able to utilize the skills I am learning about now. School starts on Wednesday, Jan. 7, I could use another week off to feel fully rested and rejuvenated, but it is what it is and I know this will be a good semester!

Aside from school and my family, I love to spend time with my friends, I used to hang out with my friends a whole lot more, but now it is rare, but I have lots of great memories of my friends and I will try hang out with them more this year.

I love to take road trips and travel. I haven’t always had the money to travel far, but i have been able to see Halifax, NS, Montreal, Quebec, Ottawa, ONT, Toronto, ONT, lotsa SK, parts of BC and here in Alberta, I also seen Niagara Falls, which is beautiful and amazing. I seen all the western states, I love Las Vegas, it’s a great city. I also love Seattle and that whole area, it’s so beautiful and just a great place to drive around and see different stuff. Just this past year we went to Honolulu and seen lots of the island and got to enjoy the beautiful sights Honolulu has to offer! It was awesome. My plan is to do a whole lot of travelling in my life time, I am most interested in seeing Egypt, I just have to get there. I also want to see Marrakech, Morrocco, places in India and China and I want to see places in the Caribbean, so I hope I am blessed with the opportunity to see those places and wherever else I’m able to get to!

When it comes to other things I enjoy doing, I love to bead, if I was truly able to do anything I wanted, it would be to stay at home and bead in a perfectly set up crafting room for half the day and then be able to counsel and help people get through difficult life experiences for the other half of the day, so that’s the goal. I love to bead, I am not that great at it yet, bc I just took it up in the summer of 2013 and I’ve been crazy busy since that time, but I do love to bead and make other types of jewellery. So as I finish work I’ll post it on here.

So the most important part of my life above anything else is my niece Selah. She is my whole wide world and I love her with all of my being. She is 6 years old now, soon to be 7. She is so funny and maybe one day I’ll write more about her, but I am tired and I want to go to bed and I want to do a nice post about her sometime that isn’t done quickly! But she is everything.

So yeah, hanging out with Selah, going to school, working, hanging out with my family and friends, doing bead work, crafting and reading for fun and planning the next road trip is what I am basically about these days.

I am here because I want to write more about First Nations issues though, and I want it to be a good blog that is full of information but I also want to document my time and have a place to write out my thoughts over the year. So I guess that’s that for now! 🙂

Be The Change!

Be the Change

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Be the Change.”

What change, big or small, would I like my blog to create?

I guess just for myself, I would like to change how I document my life and what it is that I’m doing and how I feel and how I think as I am now, so when I am older I can come and look at this and see how I’ve changed as I’ve had new experiences, met more people and how my interactions will change (hopefully in more good ways than the opposite) with the people that I know and love. So that is one change I’d like to see, is the changes of myself.

As for a change in the world, well I like to think that I am a woman that wants to have peace in this world. A world that allows each of us to be who we truly are, a world where we can embrace our culture and where we come from and know our traditions and yet still be allowed to be modern and adapt to the world we live in now. I like change, and I like tradition, but I like balance. So I hope that we can find ways to create balance. So with this blog and sharing my thoughts and my ideas than I hope that I can add to the work that others are doing as well that is moving towards healthy change for all of us in all of our communities.

Of course as a Blackfoot woman, it is always on my mind to be working for my community and to find ways to make our community healthier, so I hope that I can be of help in that area with my blog.

Also, of course I didn’t follow my initial plan to write every day, the two days that I haven’t wrote, Jan. 2 and Jan. 3, I thought about writing, but I wasn’t around my laptop and don’t have enough room on my iPhone to add this app! So I will do that soon. But yes, I did realize I was missing those days and I did realize that I was already getting behind on my blogging!

I’m not sure I’m really blogging yet, but I’m enrolled in a course to start learning how to blog that starts tomorrow! so yay!

But just for my own records, on January 2nd, I had a great Friday night going out with my beautiful cousins, Shan, Neal and the birthday girl Andrea! we had so much fun, went to the slice and then sang songs all night! I have so much fun with them, we always have the greatest evenings together! 🙂

and January 3rd, we went shopping for a new TV and finally got a nice big TV, then we had a great meal at Song Thuan, our favourite Lethbridge Vietnamese restaurant! The wait staff was awesome! Such a difference it makes when you are being served with kindness and friendliness. Plus our food was great! so it was a good weekend!

Today my Mom and I went to church at St. Basil’s on the Northside. It is freeeeeeezing outside but we went out for church, I always get lots out of listening to the gospel, today we were reminded to bring God into our lives on a daily basis and not just for the one hour we are at church, I always like to be reminded, but I am also thankful that I am a spiritual person and believe fully that I am always with God and surrounded by the Grace of God always. So then the Father said that it isn’t enough to have faith, we need to help other’s see the love of God and to help other’s to believe and to help other’s on their way to God’s love. I hope that I am always an extension of God’s love, but I also believe in freedom, so if someone is in need of prayer, I will pray for them, but I also think that it is to everyone’s own free will to be on their own spiritual journey and I think God will be where they need to find them, so it’s kind of confusing for me to explain but I just feel like, I will do as I’ve been doing because I haven’t felt uncomfortable with my beliefs on any level so far. So that’s that for now! 🙂 I will write another post that is for Jan. 4/15. This was the challenge for Jan. 2. I didn’t see one for Jan. 3 maybe they take a day off lol

Just thought of something! Books I’ve read and will read for the year! :)

Okay, so I think it would be interesting and cool to do some reading this year that isn’t strictly for school purposes.

Before the end of last semester I bought Jordin Tootoo’s autobiography, “All The Way” I just looked up at it, I hid it under some stuff on the shelf in my closet because after I read it I got really super sad!

So I bought it before finals even started and I had a whole stack of assignments to finish and I was just so overwhelmed and wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to pull the semester off! I was freaking out, but anyhow, was in Costco, saw the book, had heard it was a good book from a few of my friends and I thought, I want to read this anyway because I already just love Jordin Tootoo, so I bought it. I told myself, you can read this AFTER you get done this semester as a treat to yourself of some sort.

So I survived the semester, got everything done, had a good cry to let out my crazy frustrations from the crazy semester I had and got comfortable to read his book. It’s a short book, I think I read it in a few days, I couldn’t just sit and read it because it was a busy time of year, with Christmas and all, but I did make time for it and I finished it really fast.

It’s a good story! don’t get me wrong, I think I hid it so I wouldn’t think about it anymore though. The story is of his life, not just about hockey, but there’s a lot about hockey in it, but it’s about his struggles, his family life, his addictions, his love and his brother Terence.

The part about suicide was what really got to me. My friend, who I took like a little sister, Galena, committed suicide a few years back, I don’t know why I can never remember the exact day or year, probably because I don’t like to remember.

Galena was younger than me, I met her when I started to sing with the Kainai Grassland Singers, a traditional/contemporary First Nations singing group led by my good friend Olivia Tailfeathers, I joined a group of girls who already knew one another really well and I was older than most of them, but each one of them have become some of my best friends, we don’t see each other often or keep in touch that closely other than Facebook, but I love them all just as much as I did back then.

Galena was a Mom, she had 2 young children and she was pregnant with her 3rd baby. The last time I seen her was in the mall, she came up to me and gave me a big hug as she always did and had a big smile on her face, telling jokes and being silly. She was always up for some laughs, always telling a crazy story and smiling! I can still see her big beautiful smile right now. But she told me, “I need to talk to you, I need you right now, I’m going through some tough times and I know you’ll make me feel better” and I told her I would, that I would go see her and we could talk more, then we went on our way, it was busy in the mall that day for some reason. And then I didn’t go see her, life got busy. I don’t know why I didn’t go see her, I’m not even sure how much time went by from that last time I seen her until I got the news that she had committed suicide. It’s not really something that I want to go into too much detail with because I guess I didn’t think I would be thinking about this with my new blog. But my heart broke into a gazillion pieces that day and I don’t think your heart ever fully heals from the loss of such a beautiful person. I love her, she was a beautiful soul.

So for many reasons Jordin Tootoo’s book really got to my heart, but he talks about overcoming his addictions and I finished the book and ended up feeling really inspired by him. He is a very determined individual and he was just so real and impactful with his book. Honest and fearless. He is a hero for many reasons and I think I’ll always be a Tootoo fan, no matter who he plays for, I’m not a hardcore hockey fan, my other favourite hockey player is Rene Bourque, he’s awesome and I got to meet him too a few years back. But Tootoo is one tough dude and I love to watch him fight on the ice.

So that was the last book that I read in 2014 and I don’t really know which book I’ll read next! But I will find one and read it and share it on my blog! So that’s that for now! First day of blogging and this is my 3rd post already! woot woot. Take care whoever reads this someday or never, I’m doing this mostly for me anyway! 🙂 But tell your friends and family you love them every chance you get, life changes in a heart beat. I love you Galena! I know you knew that though, that gives my heart some peace.

New skin??

New Skin

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “New Skin.”

So I’m new to blogging, but somehow came across this writing prompt, new skin.

I’m a First Nations woman from the Kainai Nation. We are located in southern Alberta, Canada, we are east of the beautiful Rocky Mountains, protected for generations and generations by the amazing Chief Mountain. No matter where I go, no matter how long it’s been, I always feel most safe when I can see the Chief. I am connected to this physical space. I always feel best when I am here. It’s a connection I can’t really explain, but I’m sure some of you have felt this connection wherever you are from.

So the question is something about who’s “skin” or other person would you like to live as for a whole year, something like that, well I have always wanted to know what it would have been like to have lived here before European contact as a Kainaikii (Kainai woman). I know it would be so completely different and I can’t fully imagine what my role would be like. I am sure it would have it’s plus side and it’s down side. Nonetheless I think it would be cool.

It would be interesting to speak fluent Blackfoot, to have to live in a tipi and see the buffalo all across the prairie. It would be hard as well, but I would know what my People were truly like in their traditional state of existence.

New Year! New Blog

I haven’t ever blogged before, but I got a lot of stuff on my mind all of the time and I figured I would give it a try!

I had to do a blog for one of my classes last semester and I thought it would be cool to do one of my own that isn’t for school or anything…

So what will I write about? anything and everything, whatever comes to my head. Today I am just setting it up, but my goal is to write once a day and to do my best to put up stuff that I find interesting.

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This was just a test to see how this works, but we spent the Christmas holidays in Vegas. We thought it would be deserted but it was the opposite! lol packed to the gills everywhere we went. But we checked out Jabbawockeez and they were awesome! loved the show and I will definitely be going to see them the next chance I get!

The new year is always an exciting time to take on new challenges, make different choices and see how long you can stick to it. I haven’t made resolutions in a long time because I never stuck to them, but this blog is a resolution, so we will see how that goes!